Puplet's Pontifications

Back soon

2008-07-22T00:39:00.002Z

A terabyte of storage has its uses, including making for a very useful step when calibrating one's monitor that has red-shifted over the months I've been away from here. Of course, colour calibration is not the most useful thing when you're a small dog with limited colour vision. But it makes for more accurate black and white conversions if nothing else.

Not much typing being done...

2008-02-03T12:27:00.001Z

... but that's not to say I don't know how :-)

89 words

Touch Typing online

A handful of Bagpusses...

2007-12-15T01:35:00.000Z

New camera, which is as tiny as church mice and miniature, stripey pink cats...

Donna Nook

2007-11-05T21:02:00.000Z

Nature red in tooth and claw ... can also be intimidatingly frisky it seems.

An unusual bed...

2007-10-24T16:05:00.000Z

...for Fran, with novels by Douglas Coupland, Salman Rushdie and Terry Pratchett just a paw's stretch away.

In Memoriam

2007-10-19T10:23:00.000Z

Walking around Beverley yesterday, I was shocked to discover that John Hillman, the butcher who ran Ye Olde Pork Shoppe, had died. I didn't know him very well at all but I liked him: the way he didn't say much; the way he had supreme confidence in the meat he sold; and the way he always seemed to mistake me for someone else whom he'd been keeping things aside for.

The longest conversation I ever had with John was about forerib and how nice it was. It was a short conversation, just a few quiet grunts, a few nods, and a universe of enthusiasm.

So thanks for all the beef, John. And thanks for letting me in on the joy of pig tails.

Jane Brocket's The Gentle Art of Domesticity

2007-10-10T15:16:00.000Z

We came back from town today with an absolute treasure of a book, Jane Brocket's (a.k.a. Yarnstorm) The Gentle Art of Domesticity, brimful with lovely things to make, eat, read and hibernate in, and all lovingly illustrated with her own photographs (taken with a "magic sensor" Fuji F30) to boot. The afternoon, with its warm, autumnal light, its freshly-brewed coffee and its box of yesterday-baked Yarnstorm flapjacks, seemed a perfect time for sitting in the garden and having a thorough read of this much-anticipated book. But Susie, after duly reminding us of the differences between domesticity and domestication (briefly delineated in the introduction of the book), had other ideas, mainly revolving around cat food.

Rejoice with me!

2007-10-04T18:51:00.000Z

For I have found the coin...

My very first royalties cheque arrived in the post this week, to the sum of only a rather modest amount, to be sure, but it had an Author Code, and a breakdown of UK/Export Sales, and all sorts of interesting ledger information which made it almost as interesting as if it'd been for a gazillion pounds. While it's not made me a rich little dog, it has made me feel warm, fuzzy and writerly inside, which is nice.

Fujica 35EE (1961)

2007-08-26T13:31:00.000Z

Occasionally, a camera comes along that is just wilful but brilliant in its design. The Fujica 35EE is one such camera:

At first glance, it looks unassuming enough. Clearly a rangefinder camera. The grid-like square suggests some kind of batteryless selenium-based exposure meter. There's dials round the lens, probably for focusing and aperture:

Closer inspection, oh look, there are the aperture settings - not phased at all. I set an aperture, take a look through the viewfinder. How do I set the speed of the shutter? and where do I find information about what speed to set it to?

Yes, that's right, the shutter speed dial is built into the lens and the exposure meter readings is given in a little window on the top of the camera. There's no focusing mechanism on the lens though. How do you focus? Ah ha, it turns out it's done with that little metal thumb wheel which simultaneously rotates that little disk with all those numbers on it - yes, that's right, there's a dedicated dial to display depth of field values at any given distance and aperture... Gosh...

And, now, I've focused, selected my shutter speed, selected my aperture, and am ready to take the shot. I gently squeeze the shutter button next to the exposure meter. It doesn't fire. Of course, you have to wind on the film. Where's the wind-on lever?

On the bottom...with a built-in reminder dial about the kind of film you've got in it. There's a cute little frame counter next to it to. And a tripod mount. Handy. The reminder dial reminds me that I've not set the ASA speed. Where's that?

And, yes, that is the film rewind crank sticking out of the side of the camera... Did I mention that you get shutter priority mode, despite not having a battery? That said, there may, actually be a battery compartment somewhere that I've not found...

I can't help but reminded of a certain crab...

Spartacus; or, Nothing New Under the Sun

2007-08-12T08:48:00.000Z

In 1997, Apple released the 20th Anniversary Macintosh, codenamed: Spartacus. It retailed at $7,500, and shipped with a 250mhz processor, 32mb of RAM, a 2gb hard-drive, and a 4x CD-ROM. All this was reasonably high-spec at the time but the TAM's unique selling point was that it was an all-in-one desktop with a built-in LCD screen and thus looked very, very futuristic indeed. To make things even more futuristic, Apple took one of their laptop keyboards and turned it into a full-sized peripheral. Low-profile keys, you see, meant futuristic. Ooh...
(Photo: Wikipedia)

The low-profile keys are back, with the shiny new iMac:

Except this time you get a numeric keypad. Unless you go for the wireless keyboard option. In which case you don't. Because, you know, wireless is futuristic - and, as we saw in the TAM, the future doesn't do numeric data-entry. No, the paranoid android in the corner takes care of all the numbers :-)

Palimpsest

2007-08-03T00:56:00.000Z

Given that the epistolary form is, necessarily, a performative genre (with its explicit audience, and, often, its participation in a distinctly public discourse); and given that it is well known that, when we tell stories, the need for grand narrative effect often jostles with - and shouts down - the need for objective, verifiable truth ... I feel no compunction at all in having written to Amateur Photographer magazine with a lovely picture of me and my tiny Olympus XA2...

Feeling crafty....

2007-08-01T17:31:00.001Z

And, for my next encore, I made a hard aluminium flight-case for the lenses currently scattered precariously round my room.

Case: £3.35 (£10 for 3), B&Q
High density foam: £5.50, Dunelms
Time: 1.5 hrs
Bear: Winnie by Bears of Eastwood

Transplant

2007-08-01T17:22:00.000Z

Take one dead iPod Mini. Crack open. Remove 4gb Microdrive. Insert Compactflash card from digicam. Re-assemble. Result: working iPod Mini with longer battery life and no moving parts to make music skip when jumping around!

Let us eat cake!

2007-08-01T17:16:00.000Z

Even if they weren't as helpful and kind as they are, even if the quality of their books wasn't absolutely fantastic, Ashgate would still be one of the loveliest publishers in the world. Why? Because, at conferences, while others are offering crappy discounts and free ballpoint pens, Ashgate realises that you may have had a long trip, and may be tired and hungry. So, instead of stuff you don't want, they give you a muffin.

Flood

2007-07-01T02:17:00.000Z

This isn't a picture from this week's flood. No, this is a picture from the week before, before there were surfers in Chanterlands Avenue; before there were 100 people camped out overnight in the City Hall; before rubber dinghies became legitimate forms of street transport.

And where was I this week? Safely tucked up at home, avoiding the cold, the broken sewers, the Dysentery from contaminated water. Hardly the action of an adventurous photographer with a weather-sealed camera, I know. But, hey, the flooded streets were flooded with cameras and, now, I think I understand local 17th-century poet Andrew Marvell a little better:

Let others tell the Paradox,
How Eels now bellow in the Ox;
How Horses at their Tails do kick,
Turn'd as they hang to Leeches quick;
How Boats can over Bridges sail;
And Fishes do the Stables scale.
How Salmons trespassing are found;
And Pikes are taken in the Pound.

(from Upon Appleton House, To My Lord Fairfax)

"Let others tell" ... yup, Marvell didn't like to get his paws wet if he could help it either...

A week after my favourite Coleridge quotation...

2007-06-14T00:18:00.000Z

Okay, so I knew that there were fairies in Scotland. And long-leggety beasties also. But long-leggety fairies? Someone's having me on, right?

In times gone by...

2007-05-28T15:00:00.001Z

"The intelligible forms of ancient poets,
The fair humanities of old religion,
The Power, the Beauty, and the Majesty,
That had their haunts in dale, or piny mountain,
Or forest by slow stream, or pebbly spring,
Or chasms and wat’ry depths; all these have vanish’d.
They live no longer in the faith of reason!
But still the heart doth need a language, still
Doth the old instinct bring back the old names."

From Schiller’s Piccolomini (II.iv.110ff), translated by S. T. Coleridge

In times gone by, you could stand outside Happy Snaps, press your nose to the foul-tasting window, and watch photographs appear as they were being developed, trundling, in a long, unbroken strip, up a conveyor belt to be dried, diced, and parceled up for their owners. who'd come in an hour, a week, or a day. Occasionally, a picture would break the mould of satisfactory, passable pictures, and a bored-looking lab technician might stick a sticker on it, giving standard advice about using a flash, or a tripod. But, very occasionally, there'd be a picture for which there was no sticky explanation: a strange, torn, half-image, and incongruous double exposure, or, perhaps, something had gone horribly, horribly wrong the lab's C41 processing drum, and prosaic things like colour balance had been thrown to the wind.

The age of digital doesn't allow for such mysterious pictures that exist beyond the power of all mortal photographers. At least, that is what I thought until this morning, when I successfully recovered every single one of the 200 images that I took yesterday on a single memory card, which, inadvertently, in a state of tiredness and slight drunkenness, I'd formatted. Twice. And recorded video over:

Magic light...

2007-05-18T22:44:00.000Z

With the barest fractions of nature's resources, it transpires I can create magic light. In any direction. On demand. Does that make it less magic?

Three photos, all alike in dignity...

2007-05-10T01:00:00.000Z

Three duck photos, all of them personal favourites from the cute-fest that was the past week. One of them was taken with an Olympus C-5050, a four year-old digicam that's worth no more than £100 these days. The other two were both taken with my aged Olympus E-1, but one was taken with a slightly battered lens from the 1970s that cost £65; and the other used not one but two modern lenses at the same time that, combined, have a high street value of £1000 (provided you're foolish enough to shop on the high street - what's the matter with thee? hast though not heard'st of the inter-net?).

But which is which is which? and does it really matter?

This week, I'm beginning to think that perhaps every camera has its unique points, has its place in the world. Except, maybe, this one. No excuse for this at all in a modern and cultured civilization.

Tiny

2007-05-09T01:48:00.000Z

ickle

Feather duvet...

2007-05-09T01:27:00.000Z

Sigh...

Revisionist History

2007-05-06T00:30:00.000Z

After watching the excellent 300, I've been thinking a lot about the Battle of Thermopylae, 480BC, when King Leonidas of Sparta funneled the massive army of Xerxes I into one narrow pass, thus taking the edge of the military advantage off Xerxe's superior numbers. The historian, Ctesias, narrates that, on the first day, the Spartans fought a force of 10,000 and only suffered a handful of losses. Herodotus mentions that on the second day, Xerxes sent 10,000 of his finest troops, known as the "Immortals", who were most afraid as they came up against walls made from the corpses of those who'd fallen the day before.

A new fragment, attributed by experts to Herodotus, was discovered this week in the Great Library of Alexandra collection. Having lain unread for thousands of years, the new papyrus fragment finally yielded its secrets to archivists armed with the latest in mass spectrometry and infra-red equipment.

Remarkably, it suggests that contrary to previously known accounts, the Immortals may have come up against, not a wall of human corpses, but a wall of very fluffy ducks, living and breathing, and looking tremendously, tremendously adorable:

Well, the movie took liberties with history - why can't I? :-)

Big and Small II

2007-05-01T18:26:00.000Z

This week, various shops across the globe started stocking Olympus's new camera, the E-410, a gently updated version of the E-400 that enjoyed a Europe-only release back in September.

Whether or not it's better than the E-400 remains to be seen. Certainly, it has a larger buffer, faster autofocus, all things that make it good. But I wonder whether we've seen the last of a breed with the E-400, which had a lovely but expensive and rather scarce 10 megapixel sensor made by Kodak, similar to that used in the illustrious E-1. The E-410 sensor's a bit like the Panasonic one in the E-330, which seems to yield slightly more muted images.

The forums, this week, were filled with the usual chatter: people who found themselves incapable of holding the camera because it didn't have a grip on the right side (digital newbs); people who had the hands of giants grafted onto them at birth who couldn't operate the new miracle of rare device; and the usual nay-sayers telling folks like me that we'd wasted our money on a dead-end digital system that was to go the way of the dinosaurs.

A whole bunch of other people, however, rather cautiously welcomed the little camera and were eager to find out whether they could get away with carrying a little less gear if they got one. But then came the advertising, over at the specially constructed olympus-wonder.com site. And then the same people started wondering whether they had, after all, been lusting after a girl's camera.

Because, look, the well-known Japanense actress, Aoi Miyazaki, stars in the advert. And she's little, and quirky, and talks to small children, and giggles at dogs.

Having decided the E-410 was, indeed, a camera for young women, the community moved on... "Fworgh", they said in unison, "Would you just look at that strap?"

And, then, they wondered whether, if they bought the new camera, Ms Miyazaki would like them better.

If I was a camera designer, I'd be rolling my eyes right now. Presumably, they'd been running around, sourcing new sensors for the new global camera, presumably they'd been stressed about putting the finishing touches on the E-410's new cousin, the E-510, presumably there were software modifications to the end with the new TurboPic III image processing engine which promises less digital noise at high ASAs without sacrificing too much fine detail, presumably they'd been wondering how to cram all this in into the smallest digital SLR ever made in the history of photography.

And, all that time, they could have just impressed the world with crochet.

Indecisive Moment II

2007-04-30T01:04:00.000Z

For a split-second, everything was perfect. The clouds parted and an isolated beam of sunlight fell through the window, onto our ordinarily rather prosaic landing, transforming it, momentarily, into something more dynamic and theatrical. Susie Cat, ever the sun-worshipper, planted herself firmly in this spotlight, looking, in my eyes at least, even more regal than usual. My camera-brain, the one that lets me know when modern technology might fail me, was whirring like clockwork and, unlike later in the week when I'd get really muddy, was giving me useful, faultless advice.

I pre-focused my increasingly trusty Olympus C-5050, visually checked composition on the LCD screen, and gently, gently, depressed the shutter.

But the C-5050 isn't a digital SLR. Like most digicams, there's a tiny lag between the moment the shutter is pressed and when the picture is taken. Some reviews record that this lag is around 0.2s in length. And, somewhere, in that fraction of a second, in the way that some people in group shots must blink, Susie decided to stick her tongue out at me...

Talk about comic timing.

2007-04-22T22:31:00.000Z

The Olympus XA, first manufactured in 1975, was a stroke of genius from the mind of Yoshihisa Maitani, the man who brought you the path-breaking Olympus OM series. Maitani has always been obsessed with small cameras: the OM cameras were 35% smaller and lighter than any of the competition; you could fit the half-frame Pen camera into a shoe - and still have room in there for several interchangeable lenses; the pocket-sized Olympus Mju was one of the most successful compact cameras ever.

The XA is the smallest 35mm rangefinder camera ever built. You can manually focus it, select film speed and apertures, attach a flash and, most importantly, it had a radically, phenomenal six-element 35mm lens on it. It was also kind of fiddly and though that appealed to some people, it didn't to others who had SLRs for fiddly work and wanted something simpler, without compromising on quality, for their shirt-pocket point-and-shoot.

Enter the Olympus XA2 in 1980. It shares the same iconic shell design, the same feather-light electromagnetic shutter which does a fantastic job of minimizing camera shake but, instead of aperture priority, it offers a simple full-program mode and, instead of rangefinder focusing, it's got a simple, three-step focusing scale.

It's puppy-sized and lovely, and I'm looking forward for a good, bright day, when I'll be taking it out on the streets, loaded with a roll of monochrome film. What is making me giggle most nerdishly, though, is in the care instructions at the back of the manual:

Drop it in water, and angels will pray over it; drop it on the ground, and it will hurt its leg...

What?